In a world of lies, David Hoffman is on a mission to deliver truth.
Hoffman, author of “Relationships Over Rules: 7 Principles to Lead Gracefully and Love Generously – Harnessing the Power of Relationships to Overcome Your Past and Embrace Your Future,” is a successful business and family man today — but his journey didn’t start out that way.
“The world tells us all these rules of what you can’t do,” he told CBN News, citing some of the lies he was tempted to believe. “I grew up Jewish, so I can’t be a believer … I was raised in a broken household without a lot of love, and so I can’t be married with kids and show them unconditional love.”
While many people might buy into lies like these based on their circumstances, Hoffman said there’s another path, one centered on the Lord.
“I just want to encourage people that, with [God] in the center — with the gifts He gives you — with the relationships He places in your life, you can reach your true potential,” he said.
Hoffman said his upbringing led to complex feelings and emotions. Overall, he felt a lack of love as a child, and this missing puzzle piece left him with a great deal of pain.
“My father left when I was 11,” he said. “I grew up with like a lot of neglect and I felt like I was alone a lot.”
Hoffman continued, “I would ask God why He would let all these bad things happen to good people.”
It’s understandable why he felt so conflicted. Hoffman described a childhood filled with abuse. The challenges were profound — so much so that, when nourishment was reportedly withheld, he resorted to eating dog food when he was hungry.
And that’s just one example of his purported struggles.
Over time, Hoffman came to understand God’s nature and character, realizing the Lord isn’t the author of any of the evil we might face in life.
Rather than living in lament, he came to appreciate this reality.
“I just want to encourage people … that your past does not define your purpose,” he said. “And your past doesn’t dictate your potential. And, so, for me, not having … many loved ones in my life, not feeling a lot of love, not having a lot of opportunity … it made me crave those and appreciate those.”
Hoffman said he has “learned forgiveness” and has “no malice towards anyone” from his past. In fact, the struggles have only made him stronger and more persistent.
“Adversity became a gift as I got older, because, again, I’m grateful,” he said, noting he doesn’t want anyone else to feel the loneliness and pain he once experienced. “I felt like I was always being told, ‘No,’ and so I want to always find the, ‘Yes.’”
For Hoffman, much of the chaos in his life was healed after becoming a Christian. Because he was raised religiously Jewish, he said he didn’t hear about Jesus until he was 30 years old.
“Unbeknownst to me, God had big plans,” he said. “I didn’t even know Him.”
Hoffman had recently moved to Charlotte, North Carolina, at the time and was working hard to find success — something he discovered after getting into real estate in 2005.
By 2008, business was booming, and then the economic crash hit him hard. Plus, Hoffman had a one-year marriage before his ex-wife left him.
“The money dried up and there was no faith foundation, and so we went separate ways,” Hoffman said.
One night, though, he felt a voice speak to him and that message changed everything.
“So, one day, I’m meeting with a dear friend … who loves the Lord, and the night before, I heard God say to me — I didn’t know it was God yet — but I heard an audible voice say, ‘You’ve trotted your way for almost 30 years. Give me a chance,’” Hoffman said. “And the next day, I went to lunch with a dear friend. And he said, ‘David, you’ve tried your way for almost 30 years. You look tired. Give it to God. Give Him a chance.’ And this same friend had taken me to church two days earlier.”
At that lunch in 2009, Hoffman realized how tired he was and how much he needed the Lord. Erupting in tears, he admitted his need for God, and his journey with the Lord commenced.
“That Tuesday afternoon I said, ‘I’m tired. I’m just tired, God. … I’ve tried it my way long enough. I’m just going to give it to you,’” Hoffman recalled. “The next day, I met my wife.”
From then on, the puzzle pieces started to come together. Now, Hoffman sees how it all connected for God to work good in his life.
“God makes no mistakes,” he said. “I just point to Jeremiah 29: 11 — ‘He has a plan for us and for us to prosper.’ And it’s not always on our time.”
Today, he’s focusing his attention on his blessings, and he hopes “Relationships Over Rules” helps people discover God’s plans for their lives.
“I want to encourage people that their past does not define His plan and purpose of their life or their potential,” Hoffman said. “And that adversity they faced last night or 30 years ago … that is actually providing a unique perspective that only they have to really be grateful to see all that God is doing [in] their life.
